I’ve always had this idea that sugar wasn’t an issue to me.
Other than PMS and pregnancy (during pregnancy, I HAD TO HAVE IT NOW), I simply don’t crave sugar. Giving up sugar as part of the Lenten Challenge was really just a lark that I added a week into it. What I’ve since discovered is that while sugar wasn’t ever a weight-gain issue for me, it had some other serious side effects!
On Tuesday night, I stayed up late-late-late working on a deadline — 4am, to be precise. After I finished my work at 2pm the following day, I decided that I *deserved* a reward. That reward came in the form of a pint of Ben & Jerry’s “Dublin Mudslide.” It’s divine. Or, at least I used to think so.
With the first few bites, I noticed that it was much sweeter than what I really wanted, and that the texture bothered me (huh?). Yet still, I kept the pint on my desk, and whittled away at it until it was just a bit more than half-gone. Wednesday night while watching “Medium,” I polished it off. No big deal, right? Wrong.
Hello, mood swings. Yesterday morning, I was experiencing the sorts of negative thoughts that usually would only accompany depression! I hated living in Santa Fe. I would be better off single. I’m doing nothing with my life. Blah, blah, blah. (For the record, none of these things are true. I was in “a mood,” and I knew it.) Doing TWO pulled me out of that mental line of bizarre thought — I was amazed at how much better (and more sane) I felt even five minutes into a workout. By “jazz twist” I felt like ME again. It’s a good thing that the husband has been out of reach while he’s at work!
Anyway, that was a relief. I mentally felt like myself again. That didn’t prepare me, though, for the afternoon. My energy went through. the. floor. Seriously, I was having a difficult time doing the smallest, simplest tasks. You know, like *standing* up. Combine that with a whiny daughter who was in a clingy mood, and I was SO relieved when her bedtime hit! On top of that, I kept craving food (lots! of! food!) between meals, and I puffed up enough that if I’d measured, I’m sure my waist/hips could have been as much as 2 inches bigger. I hit bed around 11 (after snoozing on the sofa for probably an hour), and didn’t get up until 7:40 this morning. Ah, restorative sleep.
Today, things are back to normal. I’m not energy-depleted. I’m not craving foods in a weird way like I was yesterday. I’m — for the most part — back to where I was pre-ice cream. In other words, I feel good.
What really astonishes me is that before, I would have not noticed an effect from ice cream. My general level of feeling well was low enough that the dip from sugar was unnoticeable! Now, even eating dried apricots will make me draggy a few hours later, unless I combine them with some protein. The best part is, I’m not really missing sugar now. In the past, if I “gave something up” or (horrors) dieted, I would feel resentful that I was not “allowed” to have that item. Instead now, I don’t feel like it’s an outside influence telling me not to eat sugar. It’s me, reading my body, and realizing that feeling the way I did yesterday simply isn’t worth it. Ben and Jerry are no longer my friends.
Wow. That almost sounds mature or something.
Tags: Feeding Myself by Allison
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